true, true :P
Back…
Uff.. it’s been a long time since I wrote anything.. Well, Christmas break is over and we’re back at school.. School started back on wednesday, so in total 4 days of school, and I’ve already missed 2, and plan to miss tomorrow to go to the doctor again! I’m pretty much freaking out now about everything, I just don’t know what to do or even think anymore… Now my doctor thinks that I have PFAPA (Periodic fever,…etc.) and wants me to have surgery ( tonsillectomy I think) in hopes of removing the constant me getting sick deal, and although I do agree that I do present some of the symptoms, I still think that I have chronic fatigue syndrome as well. It’s just that if I don’t have CFS then I have no other explanation for the symptoms that I have that don’t come up in PFAPA patients.. On top of everything I think I might be entering into a depression as I just feel like I am completely alone and don’t feel like doing anything with people unless I push myself to hang out.. And the cherry on top of everything? = SCHOOL!!! It’s not like I’m not trying or that I don’t want to finish everything, I DO! Believe me!! I think that my parents and the teachers think I am just screwing around and doing it on purpose.. Believe me, If there is anyone who wants to do their work, IT’S ME!!! I have a terrible time concentrating on stuff, understanding it and remembering it.. It’s like my brain can’t / won’t take anymore info.! It is just so frustrating! I am constantly disappointed in myself and just feel like crap! I wish there was someone I could turn to about this, but for now it’s just Me, Myself and I. Anyways, if you happen to have read this, Thanks for reading! …
-Ellie
